FILK: Mineral Sequence

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 93625

Song #10 from my CoS musical, A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to 
the Chamber

Mineral Sequence (CoS, Chap. 16)

To the tune of Funeral Sequence, from Sondheim's A Funny Thing 
Happened on the Way to the Forum 

Text and a brief excerpt here (you'll have to scroll down almost to 
the bottom)

http://users.bestweb.net/~foosie/forum.htm 

NOTE: I'm using the slighter longer version from the 1996 Nathan Lane 
revival, rather than the original 1964 production

Dedicated to Catherine McK

THE SCENE: MADAM POMFREY'S infirmary. The six beings (four students, 
one ghost and one cat) who were turned to stone (stone=mineral, get 
it?) are present, attended by a worried crowd of their friends and 
loved ones. To one side, SPROUT awaits her mandrakes as they approach 
maturation.

POMFREY (spoken)
Gather around, friends of hard rock
..

DOBBY (music)
Shed the tear,
Sound alarms!
Feel the fear,
Watch for harm!

FILCH 
My cat is now concrete

RON & HARRY (looking at Hermione)
Our ally is an alloy

NEVILLE 
And Colin's a completely 
Stone boy

PERCY (looking at Penelope)
Like bronze

PEEVES (looking at Nearly-Headless Nick)
Or fumes..

ERNIE & HANNAH (looking at Justin Finch-Fletchley)
Or gypsum,

FRED
Or sapphire. . .

GEORGE:
Or Protactinium 

DOBBY
His cat is now concrete
Their ally is an alloy
No more can we suspect young Malfoy

SPROUT
Lop the leaf,
Chant the charms,
Soon relief
>From my farm!

(Exit all, except POMFREY, SPROUT, RON & HARRY – and of course the 
statues)

POMFREY (to RON & HARRY) 
Children, on behalf of the statue, I want to thank you for a lovely
visit. I don't know about you, but I've suffered enough. If you will 
just
take your leave, I shall take the body along with its note back 
inside . . .

SPROUT
Sew the scarves,
Stitch the socks,
Trim and carve
Earmuffs block!

HARRY (spoken)
Whoa! A note? What kind of note?

POMFREY (spoken)
A note, I quote..

HARRY
Oh, a wrote note

RON: 
It must be read!

POMFREY
Read? Sir!

RON:
We want that paper!

HARRY
Madam Pomfrey, I implore you: It is not for us to let this paper 
remain. It's from the library, and the library is awaiting it. The 
library would not be happy if they had to send up an overdue notice.

POMFREY
I cannot afford to offend Ms. Pince.

HARRY
Who can?

(HARRY & RON pry the page loose from Hermione's hand and read it 
together)

HARRY & RON (music)
This page has clues, we'll wage
`Twas won with no small risk
And here's the passage Herm would have us fisk:
"The King of Serpents, known as basilisks!"

     -	CMC (I really do have a life. Really)

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm