[HPforGrownups] Re: Harry's disposition -Suburban Wasteland

[Laura Ingalls Huntley]

No: HPFGUIDX 94616

I've done some pretty radical snipping of this post, as I only want to 
comment on certain aspects of it -- hope Steve doesn't mind. ^_^

Steve (bboy_mn):
<SNIP reasons for Harry's anger in OotP>
> If that weren't enough, he is then uncerimoniously dumped at Privet
> Drive. No one makes any attempt to talk to him, to lend any
> reassurance or perspective to his own near death and Voldemort's
> rebirth. As always, Herry is left ALONE to deal with the situation on
> his own. "Stiff upper lip" and all that be damned, don't these people
> have brains, or hearts, for that matter. It didn't occur to anyone
> that Harry might need some support to deal with that trama? OOOOH
> NOOOOO! Just let him work it out on his own.

Notice that this is also pretty much what happens at the end of OotP -- 
Harry's just lost someone *very* important to him due to circumstances 
that are at least partially his own fault . . . and the people closest 
to him just ship him back to Privet Drive like everything's normal.  
The only discussion he gets on the matter are from near-strangers (Luna 
and NHN), who know nothing of his relationship with Sirius, and next to 
nothing about the circumstances of his death.

Steve:
> Now to the most critical part. Harry, as always in his sad life, has
> only himself to rely on to deal with his tramatic circumstance. But as
> some one with limited life experience, as some one with few role
> models, few guides in his life, few examples of balance and
> perspective in life, few balanced reference points, it's not a
> surprising that his thinking occassionally gets a little twisted.

*nods* Like it did at the end of OotP, when he "decided" that Sirius's 
death was Snape's fault, but ultimately (IMO) still blames himself.  
Personally, I think both of these conclusions are not only wrong, but 
unhealthy, and *someone* ought to have realized The Way Harry Thinks 
and headed off the damage before it started.

Steve:
> Look at how quickly his thinking became warped when the returned from
> visiting Mr. Weasley in the hospital the first time. In no time at
> all, using a seemingly perfect path of logic, Harry has himself
> convinced that he is some kind of monster that is a danger to everyone
> around him.
> Since he has never in his life had anyone he could comfortably turn to
> for support and perspective, he decides on his own that he has to
> leave Grimmauld Place and return to Privet Drive. Only the fortuitous,
> yet without explanation or reason, demand by Dumbledore that he 'stay
> where you are', keeps Harry from leaving. Even then, he is not
> reassured, and reasonably so. Instead, still convinced he is a monster
> that isn't fit to be around normal people, Harry spends his time
> hiding from his friends.

Who are all, for some inexplicable reason, too afraid of him or his 
feelings to *help* him.  At least until Hermione shows up, that is.

Ginny's angry retort to Harry's fears of possession is often 
highlighted by Ginny fans as proof that she isn't afraid to disagree 
with and Set Him Straight -- but (aside from the fact that she is Dead 
Wrong about possession in the first place) where *was* she all that 
time Harry was working himself into deep depression?  Does she just not 
*care* that he's obviously in need of reassurance?  Does she think he's 
merely being sulky and ought to snap out of it on his own?  I don't get 
it.  Granted, *Ron* didn't even seem to be able to work up the nerve to 
confront his own best friend, so I guess we can let his younger sis off 
the hook.

Steve:
<SNIP>
> Given the hellishly tramatic things Harry has experienced, and the
> absolutely horrible (near criminal in my book) support he has been
> given by the people he trusts, it's a complete wonder that Harry is as
> well adjusted as he is.

This particular passage always stands out to me at the end of OotP (UK 
ed., pg. 724).

"Ron and Hermione left the hospital wing completely cured three days 
before the end of term.
Hermione kept showing signs of wanting to talk about Sirius, but Ron 
tended to make
hushing noises every time she mentioned his name. Harry was still not 
sure whether or not
he wanted to talk about his godfather yet; his wishes varied with his 
mood. He knew one
thing, though: unhappy as he felt at the moment, he would greatly miss 
Hogwarts in a few
days' time when he was back at number four, Privet Drive. Even though 
he now understood
exactly why he had to return there every summer, he did not feel any 
better about it. Indeed,
he had never dreaded his return more."

For perspective, this paragraph occurs after Harry sits alone down by 
the lake and cries about Sirius, and before he finds the mirror and has 
the conversation with NHN.

So . . . Hermione wants to talk to Harry about Sirius . . . and Ron 
*stops* her?!  Of course, ideally, Ron has a point -- it's probably 
better to wait awhile and see if Harry comes to them when he's ready.  
Yet, there are two major factors that make the Sit-Back-And-Wait 
approach a Bad Idea.  A) Harry's going back to Privet Dr. *very* soon, 
where he gets absolutely zero emotional support and is cut off from his 
friends and the WW in general. (Nevermind the fact that being there 
depresses him under the best of circumstances, let alone with the death 
of a friend/father figure weighing on his conscience.)  B) Since when 
has Harry *ever* asked for help, especially the emotional kind?

If Book Six rolls around and Harry is (once again) battling depression 
and self-doubt to the point that he blows up at innocent bystanders, I 
will not be one bit surprised or disappointed with him.  Because, you 
know what?  They *aren't* innocent.  Harry's friends and mentors know 
him well enough, I think, to recognize when he needs help and to 
understand that he doesn't know how to ask for it.  Yet, somehow, when 
our boy really *needs* somebody, everyone around him is either too 
afraid to confront him or under orders from Dumbledore not to talk to 
him.

Strange, huh?

Laura (who leaves this rather rant-y post grumbling that at least 
Hermione *wanted* to try and that Dumbledore is *so* grooming Harry to 
be a good solider.)


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