In defense of Molly /Molly's treatment of Arthur

[slgazit]

No: HPFGUIDX 136522

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "phoenixgod2000" <jmrazo at h...>
wrote:
> Arthur does do things counter to Molly's wishes on a number of 
> occasions and almost all of them he does behind her back.

Arthur and Molly have a fairly clear division of labor. She runs the
household and has the final say on how to raise the kids. He brings in
the bacon, works crazy hours and tinkers to his heart's desire with
muggle stuff. We've never seen Molly complaining about his odd hours.
She always has comfort and food ready whenever he comes. Likewise she
raises no stink over his "toys" unless they are used illegally (e.g.
flying car).

So Arthur indeed defers to Molly when it's something related to
handling of their underage kids (and Harry). Hers is the ultimate word
in that area and I must say that usually her assessments are right on
the mark. True she overprotects Harry but I can understand her desire
to protect him if I don't always agree with her actions.

Because of the above, the only times Arthur goes "behind her back" as
you call it are the rare occasions when he strongly disagrees but
feels that arguing the subject further will not do them any good. He
had no problems standing up to Molly in OoP when Fred and George
wanted to listen to Harry's debriefing in 12 Grimauldplace, because
they were over 17 and thus out of Molly's jurisdiction.

A few other cases is when his fascination with muggle stuff overrides
his common sense. Molly explodes upon hearing he tried stiches and
quite rightly so - it could have killed him.

> I take offense to that remark.  I guess I am for thinking that Molly 
> should treat Arthur with the same respect he treats her with.

She respects him, no doubt, and when he puts his foot down, she lets
him have his way. Theirs is the classic "assertive wife, quiet
husband" marriage and it seems to suit them both.

> Yeah, I don't like Hermione. I don't like her obnoxiousness over the 
> fake felix potion. I don't like her self importance.

She has a lot of very justifyable confidence due to her strong
intellect but also a strong sense of justice and morality, rare in
kids her age. I loved the little scene in HBP where Ron kicks a
younger student from the seat by the fire only to be kicked off in
turn immediately by Hermione who then offers the other student back
his seat. She definitely has good influence on Ron.

> I don't like 
> the way she uses magically conjured birds to attack Ron for daring 
> to kiss another girl besides her.  Those aren't the actions of an 
> assertive person, those are the actions of giant ^&^%*

I think he deserved the birds since he did it to annoy her...

> It's not his relationship with the kids that bothers me or her 
> disciplining of them. It's her treating Arthur like an extra child 
> and disciplining him.  I've heard it on the list many times that 
> Arthur is like an extra child she's raising. That is demeaning to 
> him. 

He brought this treatment on his himself since he can be very
irresponsible and hasty (stiches, car...).

> I think the 
> Molly/Arthur relationship is a symptom of Rowling larger issues. As 
> I talked about in a previous post I think she is, in general, very 
> down on fathers.

Her depiction of mothers and fathers leaves a lot to be desired.
Mothers are all self sacrificing and loving. Fathers are either inept
or downright abusive. I wonder if this comes from personal experience...

Salit