Why Lily didn't have to die.

[lealess]

No: HPFGUIDX 137732

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, bjebenstreit at a... wrote:
> Sherry wrote:
> 
> My big problem with the whole idea  of lily and Snape ever having 
> dated is the worst memory scene. <SNIP> I just can't believe she'd 
> go out with someone who called  her that. 
> 
> Cheryl:
> 
> <SNIP>I  think that there may be a 
> chance that they were friends (see my prior posts  about whether it 
> was possible they were childhood friends) or slightly more  at some 
> point before this incident. 
> 
> Ethanol:
>  
> I think it is possible that Lily and Snape became friends *after*
> this incident.
> <SNIP> 
> So working two years together on a subject they both liked *had* 
> to change the Snape/Lily relationship in some way. Maybe not 
> dating, but possibly friendship or at least respect.
>  
> If I had to bet my money, I'd say that Snape was in love with Lily, 
> but didn't act on it.
> Possibly because James's rescue of Snape redeemed James in Lily's 
> eyes enough to reconsider him and notch him up to boyfriend
> material.
>  
> <SNIP>
> And here is another point: Rowling at least thinks it is possible
> to fall in love with somebody 
> you've insulted and hurt and have this someone return these  
> feelings. Who? Ron and Hermione!
> <SNIP>

lealess:
 
I do not see the name-calling as a tremendous hurdle to friendship, 
because if Lily can forgive James for being a two-on-one bully, she 
can probably forgive Severus for using an offensive word.  On the 
other hand, I think Lily had a romantic interest in James early on, 
especially since Rowling basically said in her Mugglenet interview 
that Lily hated James so much she must have loved him, "You're a 
woman, you know what I'm saying."  She says that Lily "was like 
Ginny, she was a popular girl. 
 She was a popular girl, and that
is relevant. But I think you've seen that already.  She was a bit of 
a catch."  (Have we seen that already?  Rowling also thinks that 
Ginny is "warm and compassionate" -- I didn't really see that, 
either.)

So, Lily loved James all along.  I don't think Lily had a change of 
heart because James lessened his bullying and arrogance as he grew 
up.  Anyway, James did not do that completely.  Severus was always 
the exception.  James did not stop attacking him (and probably vice 
versa).

I also do not think the Shrieking Shack incident would have changed 
Lily's mind about James because how would she have even known about 
it?  Severus was probably sworn to secrecy, and if James or his 
friends boasted at the time of James saving someone's life, 
especially considering the circumstances
 what heroes!

She probably never loved Severus.  In 5th Year, she thought he 
was "as bad" as James.  Severus being hexed by James and Sirius was 
probably like seeing a dog being kicked, to her; you intervene until 
the dog bites you, and you probably don't adopt the dog on the spot.

I doubt Lily and Severus were childhood friends.  If so, wouldn't she 
have helped him with his social akwardness and dark ways?  Would she 
have discarded him at school in favor of her more popular peers?

They may have become friends over NEWT Potions.  Perhaps her 
selfless, empathetic saintliness meant that she actually found 
something to like in him.  Or, if they had a personal relationship at 
Hogwarts at all, Lily may have taken pity on the gangly, weirdo-
brainiac, non-sporty, non-popular Severus, and looked at him as a 
house-elf-type reform project, taking him home to show him a "normal" 
family, and so on.  Maybe she was a bit of a rebel, hanging out with 
the really bad boy.  Maybe she even respected him, after 5th year.  I 
like the idea of them being friendly rivals, frankly.

If she ever dated him, much less loved him, at Hogwarts, I will be 
absolutely bowled over.  Her generosity was probably more abstract 
than that.

If popularity is relevant, then perhaps Severus the Slytherin tried 
to cultivate Lily as a means to gain popularity for himself.  But he 
may have also harbored romantic feelings.  Stupid misfit, he should 
have controlled those weakening emotions and stopped trying to 
overreach his station in life right at that moment, because, 
duh, "Who on earth would want Snape in love with them? That's a
very horrible idea!"

I am guessing the person who loved Severus (besides Dumbledore) was 
his mother.  This is the pattern in the books: mother love is self-
sacrificing nobility.  And, well, lots of mothers love their 
children, but they screw up their lives big time.  One example of 
many: women with children who remain in violent relationships. I have 
tremendous compassion for them, but their decisions are rarely black 
or white, nor are the consequences.  Their lives are far more 
complicated than that.

Anyway, it's all speculation.

lealess