Amortentia and re The morality of love potions/Merope and Tom Sr.

[pippin_999]

No: HPFGUIDX 152421

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "dumbledore11214" <dumbledore11214 at ...> 
wrote:
>
> > Magpie:
> <BIG SNIP>
> > If Tom did realize that this  wasn't love he was feeling, because it 
didn't feel good, if he's suffering anything like obsession a cold 
shower is useless.  The  only way he can stop suffering is to be 
with Merope. It could feel  very much like being enslaved.  
> 
> Alla:
> 
> Well, yes, I agree, BUT I am having even bigger problem on 
> Tom "should have been able to not act on his obsession" argument. 
> Yes, Love potion produces obsession, but um, how do we know that the 
> person who drank Love potion is able to distingush between the two. 
> I mean, yes, the outside observer ( whoever that was initially who 
> created the Love potions, or somebody who tested them, etc) made 
> that conclusion, but for all we know person under the influence of 
> Love potion indeed thinks that he IS in love.
> 
> And we HEARD from Ron that he thinks that he is in love with Romilda 
> as Pippin pointed out earlier. Pippin also argued that Ron was not 
> sure, but I saw no evidence that Ron was thinking that he feels 
> something else, not love.

Pippin:

Could Ron tell that he was over-excited and might act foolishly?
 There is canon for that. When Ron gets to Slughorn's office, he trips 
over something and worries that Romilda might see it, and when Sluggie 
suggests that he take something to calm himself down, Ron eagerly says,
"Brilliant." I'm no expert, but I don't think excitement makes a person legally
incompetent  to marry-- and while the love potion has made  Ron eager 
to share his feelings, he's still concerned about looking like a prat. 

Ron had been tricked into thinking that Romilda attracted
him "Have you seen her hair, it's all black and shiny and silky...and her
eyes? Her big dark eyes? And her--" and that this attraction was love.
Whatever tradition may say,  Rowling's love potions do work by 
making the intended seem attractive.

But that could happen by Muggle means, all legal, all deceptive but 
allowable under the "all's fair in love and war" maxim. Being deceived 
about your partner's attractiveness or the depth of your feelings is
not "substantial deception." 

Adults (and Ron has just reached adulthood) are supposed to know
that their  hearts and their eyes could be wrong about things like that. 
There is no canon that love potions make one forget that, any more 
than such Muggle charms as smooth manners and high status, or 
chocolates, liquor and perfume, all of which work on the brain. 
Tom Jr needed no more than the first two to "hoodwink" Ginny into 
pouring out her soul. 

 Slughorn uses 'obsession' as a synonym for infatuation, not a 
clinical disorder.  He says that this is not real love, which again distinguishes
Rowling's potions from their other literary counterparts. Tristan and
Isolde's feelings are very real, and even the Midsummer Night's 
Dream lovers are in love for as long as the enchantment lies on them.
This is different.

Slughorn never  tells us what damage he's seen, but
canon offers three tales: the tragedy of Tom and Merope, the comedy of
Romilda and Ron, and the romance between Bill and Fleur.

Taken out of context, the story of Tom and Merope could be about
date rape, but Dumbledore keeps the story of Tom and Merope in 
the context of obsessive love by imagining that a potion has been used,
 telling Harry how Merope could have given it to Tom in a cup of water, 
and saying how she must have decided to stop using it.

 Can lovers in the Potterverse tell when their feelings are real?

 We are introduced, through Molly's comments,  to the idea that Bill 
and Fleur are being too hasty, that the pressures of war might be
intensifying what they feel for one another. She wants them to take
some time. And they do. They have a good old-fashioned year-
long engagement. 

That, IMO, is  JKR's  recipe for distinguishing between love
and infatuation. If Tom had been the sort of person, like Ron,
who was willing to wait to be  sure he wasn't making a fool
of himself, would he have run off with Merope immediately?
I think not. But he was in a hurry to satisfy himself -- and too
arrogant to think his feelings might deceive him.  And then,
being in a hurry to escape from his situation, he deserted her,
her unborn child, and the legal obligation he had taken on in his
haste to satisfy  himself. 

I don't blame him for being horrified and repulsed --but those
things do not release him from the duties he freely, if mistakenly,
hastily and unwisely, undertook.

Pippin