A Sense of Betrayal / Unforgiveables

[verosomm]

No: HPFGUIDX 174287

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "vmonte" <vmonte at ...> wrote:
>
> I (vmonte) wrote:
> Well, if I found out that my daughter messed with my brain I don't 
> think I would ever trust her again. But then again, Hermione 
> probably made them forget that too.
> 
> Katie responded:
> All I can say is that I see it differently and that Hermione, to 
me, 
> is one of the most brave and most loyal characters in the books. > 
vmonte responds:

> I like Hermione and think she is brave as well. 
> 
> And what Hermione did to her parents is just scary. Her parents
> deserved more respect than that.

I've got to agree with Katie here (hopefully I'm not putting words in 
your mouth, though)... I definitely don't think what Hermione did was 
unforgivable; far from it... I think Hermione respected her parents 
tremendously, but she loved them even more (which could have turned 
out to be problematic) for her to go through all that trouble... her 
plan was very well-thought out, mind-wise (though in my opinion not 
heart-wise which I'll get to in the next paragraph) not to mention 
emotionally terrifying for her, knowing she may never see them again 
and if so, they may not even remember her.  

While Hermione is extremely smart and probably the most emotionally 
mature of the trio, she was feeling way too much when she went 
further in the modification and modified her parents' memories to not 
know they had a daughter.  I think she did this to protect them from 
any pain should they never see or hear from her again, while a more 
rational response would have been to make them think their daughter 
is a completely different person so they could miss her but not be 
heartbroken (so IF the Death Eaters found them in Australia they 
could just say something like "our daughter is Elizabeth Ann, she's 
19, and she's at university in Canada" or something).  Protecting 
someone from emotional pain is a very basic human response (ask any 
parent!) but it is an immature one, as emotional pain is natural and 
necessary to human existence and causes maturity.  

Considering it's difficult for adults to allow emotional pain even 
when it would be beneficial or even necessary, I think parents could 
understand why their 17-year-old daughter did it... the fact that she 
did it so they would not be tortured and possibly killed, and to keep 
herself, Ron and Harry safer would also be understood.  It's not a 
wonderful situation, hell, it sucks big time, but it IS the best she 
can do... think of it this way.  

Your adult child witnesses a crime and is put in the witness 
protection program with everyone thinking he/she is dead.  You will 
never see him/her again... never get to meet the person he/she 
marries, never know your grandchildren.  Terrible, right?  But better 
than him/her being brutally murdered by criminals, no?  Again, 
horrible situation, but you have to make the best of it even if it's 
VERY far from ideal.

Veronica