Snape/Lily love or obsession

[juli17 at aol.com]

No: HPFGUIDX 172872

 
wolf:

It is a fine line between love and obsession. I beleve from  reading 
all the varied opinions out there is that those that find Snape  
altogther creepy think his feelings for Lily part of a sick obsession.  
Those that like or feel sorry for Snape seem to find his unrequited 
love  heart-warming. Perhaps when Lily ended their friendship, she saw 
not only  his dark side but his obssesive side. 



Julie:
What obsessive side? The obsessive side where he stalked her around
town, where he begged her over and over to take him back, where he  left
dead bunnies at her doorstep? Seriously though...
 
Obsession is not a four-letter word. It is not within itself necessarily  a 
bad
thing. Most of the accomplishments of humankind would not exist  without
obsession. Scientists, artists (including writers!), politicians, etc,  
etc--you
can't achieve something phenomenal without being obsessed by it, i.e.  without
putting the whole of your time and attention into it. Further, I think  
everyone
who regularly reads and/or posts here has an obsession--with Harry Potter  ;-)
We wouldn't devote a certain amount of time in our lives to it if we  weren't
obsessed in one sense of the word!
 
Which is to say there are different types and levels of obsession,  and some
types *can* exist hand-in-hand with genuine love. The worst type, that of  an
obsessed stalker, seems to be what many are accusing Snape of. But  where
is the evidence?
 
The most repeated piece of evidence is Snape as a TEN YEAR OLD  CHILD
watching Lily "greedily." Greedy is not a pretty word in general, but it  has
several meanings, and here it's connotation--"longingly" is innocuous.  Snape
is watching something that he wants for himself, or wants to be a  part of.
But which is it, because a "stalker" wants that *person* for himself,  almost
always for some sort of romantic/sexual gratification. So Snape is a  child
stalker, a miniature pervert?
 
Ridiculous, IMO. Snape does not want to possess *her*, he wants to  possess
what she *has*--love, happiness, family, and the joyous aspect of doing  
magic.
Moreover, he wants to *share* it with her, not take it from her. Throughout  
their
entire relationship Snape never once tries to *take* from Lily, never once  
tries
to coerce or force her into anything.
 
So what about a lesser form of obsession? Yes, I do agree that Snape has 
that, but not because he was initially obsessed with Lily (as in  he wanted to
possess or own her--there is not one hint of this at all!), but  because he 
caused
her death, the death of the woman he loved. His guilt over  unknowingly 
betraying
her and then being unable to save her is the root of his obsession. He  can 
never forgive himself for that, and can never regain her love  (friendship) 
or respect,
or *her* forgiveness. Because she's gone. 
 
Which brings up another factor of Snape's obsession. His obsession  only 
affects 
himself. It never affected Lily, because it didn't exist then. He loved  her 
but he
never intruded on her life once she broke off their friendship. His  
obsession,
once she was gone and the guilt overwhelmed him, did hurt *him.*  It kept him
from ever living his own life again. From that moment he focused on what  he
had to do to assauge his guilt, to earn in his mind her respect and  
forgiveness--
and that was to become Dumbledore's man and devote his life to  protecting
her son and preparing him to face Voldemort (and survive Voldemort, or so  he
assumed until Dumbledore informed him otherwise, at which point Snape
presumably had internalized some of Dumbledore's values, enough that  he
remained devoted to freeing the WW of Voldemort even though fully  protecting
the life of Lily's son had been taken out of the  equation).
 
So, love or obsession, you ask. Both, I say. First love, and later, on  top 
of that
love, obsession with his chosen path to redemption.
 
Julie 











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