C.R.O.N.I.E.S.

[Mike]

No: HPFGUIDX 177909

> Tiffany:
> I know every good villian needs a faithful minion to do his dirty
> work, but if you're lacking in basic sense, it's tough to keep them
> around also.

> *************************************************************

Out of work now that the most recent Dark Lord has been vanquished?
Dissatisfied with the lack of aggression outlets in your present 
position?
Haven't Imperiused anyone in ages?

Curseright's Recruitment Of Ne'erdowells - Interesting Employmnet 
Service is looking to place just your type.

We are a full service recruiting agency, cradle to grave (possibly 
yours, we make no guarantees). We realize that the demise of Lord 
Thingy has left a void in the market for those hard to place people 
like you. That's where we come in. Our clientelle appreciates a good 
Cruciatus Curse, cast like you really meant it. And they never 
underestimate the wizard that has, er, influence over the weak 
minded. 

Some of our success stories:

Mr. Garfield Goyle, recently of the Muggle Terrorizing wing, DE Inc.
We found Gar a job as a Bludger Utilization Training Tactician. He 
gets to aim stinging spells at bludgers all day long. And when the 
bludger proves to be inadequate, Gar gets to blow them up, ahh I mean 
recycle them. Gar Golye is sitting pretty as the head B.U.T.T.

Mr. Watkins Nott, newly released from Azkaban, umm recently a patron 
of the DE retraining facility.
We got Wat a position with Borgin's Individual Garnishments as a 
Disposer Of Personal Excesses. He now specializes in Imperiusing... I 
mean influencing folks to dispose of their unneeded personal 
possessions. Wat Nott is proud to be a B.I.G. D.O.P.E.!

Mr. Sandoval Crabbe, fresh off his job as a Relocation Umpire of 
Mudblood Personal.
We placed Sand with Karkaroff's Never Ending Enterprises as a Jewelry 
Enhancement and Return Collector. Now he finds enjoyment Cursing, umm 
enchanting jewelry for selected clientelle. Which allows his company 
to ransack, no I meant effect a judicious return of said baubles and 
any sister jewelry the client won't be needing any more. You may have 
heard of this line of work, Mr. Borgin acquired a certain opal 
necklace used in this endeavor. The great thing about it is like the  
name says, it's the gift that's never ending, even with the company's 
founder in permanent haitus. We here at C.R.O.N.I.E.S. are pleased 
with the effort Sand Crabbe has put forth as a K.N.E.E. J.E.R.C.

So don't delay, send in your Resume to CRONIES today. We're sure we 
can find a position that suits your unique talents.

*************************************************************
No Death Eaters were harmed in the production of this post.

Mike