Lupin's behavior (Was: CHAPDISC: DH11, The Bribe)

[a_svirn]

No: HPFGUIDX 180651

> Alla:
> 
> Well, that's the whole point you see. It was hurtful? Sure it was, 
> but whether it was unjust, we disagree upon it. Harry knew himself 
> at fault for calling Lupin a name, but he still says I should not 
> call him a coward, but he was acting like one.
> 
> Would you feel any better about what Harry said had he said that 
> Remus was "acting like a coward" instead of was being a coward?

a_svirn:
I wouldn't. Because the only instance in which Lupin's behavior can 
be construed as cowardly, is that he probably – and neither we, nor 
Harry know this for sure – did not discuss his decision with Tonks. 
It seems to me (but it is only conjecture on my part), that he 
presented Tonks with fait accompli. If he did he *was* acting 
cowardly towards her. But that's not what Harry accused him of. And 
things he did accuse him of – being a daredevil, trying to step in 
Sirius shoes, and even being a coward for running from his family are 
as far from the truth as it possibly can. 

>  
> > a_svirn:
> > Would open your mouth to fling "partial truths" (which are, 
> > incidentally, more than a little partial lies) at her? 
> 
> Alla:
> 
> Actually, what I will say or have said already is an absolute truth 
> from my POV. My friend was not mad at me, but she certainly 
> disagrees that what I said is a complete truth.

a_svirn:
But I think we are in the agreement, though, that Harry did not say 
the "absolute" truth from his POV. I mean he didn't really believe in 
this drivel of seeking personal glory and stuff, did he? So he 
disgorged the whole pile of untruths – which were untruths even from 
his POV – and which by far outweigh the "one halfpennyworth of bread 
to this intolerable deal of sack". 

> > a_svirn:
> > He would have done better if he did. But he was obviously and 
> > understandably distraught. An excuse that Harry did not have.
> 
> 
> Alla:
> 
> Harry did not have that excuse? I thought you said that he cooled 
> off? Isn't it the sign that he was distraught at the very least?

a_svirn:
No, it is the sign that he was angered. And it never stops to puzzle 
me why Harry is allowed to wallow in self-pity for being an orphan, 
but for Lupin to have a moment of weakness is disgraceful. 

> Alla:
> Oh, and I also want to address Harry not wanting to have a 
> relationship with Remus. You think Harry would not have wanted to 
> have a relationship with close friend of his parents when he was 
> younger? You think Harry would not have wanted that friend to visit 
> him at Dursleys or at least to write him a letter?

a_svirn:
I don't know. I don't remember Harry being particularly interested in 
Lupin after POA. In GoF he spared him one fleeing thought – compared 
Fake!Moody's teaching techniques to those of Lupin. But other than 
that he was absolutely focused on his relationships first with Sirius 
and then with Dumbledore. It didn't look that there was a place for 
Lupin in his affections. Besides in a scene we are discussing Lupin 
did offer his friendship along with his help – now that Harry was an 
adult and they could deal as equals. Harry didn't react kindly to 
that, though. 

a_svirn