[the_old_crowd] NUMPTIEs - answers and marking scheme

[silmariel]

After managing to get time to delurk, doing my best to ignore the answers. 
Didn't take the WOMBAT test.

Barry:
> Question 3.
> You discover that He-who-must-not-be-named is living next door.
> Do you:
> a) call the Aurors
> b) change the name of your house to "Dunmugglin"
> c) move

Basically, c), then remember I'm not the most popular person with Aurors and 
get someone else to do a). Consider the possibility of d) send the news to 
the Daily Prophet - with a bit of luck, the Dark Lord will have fun with the 
journalist.

> Question 4.
> You are illegally breeding dragons (for export) in London.
> Do you:
> a) develop fire-proof owls to ensure a reliable delivery service
> b) sell fire insurance (on commission) to your Muggle neighbours
> c) submit a tender for providing the Olympic flame for the 2012 Games
> d) think you can get away with it
>
> Ans.
> (2 marks)
> d)
> But you won't.
> No way.
> So don't even think of it.
> You'll be sorry if you do.

Oh, well, d). Underground breeding, and/or inside one of those useful tents 
from GoF, Moody's hole didn't seem flamable. As confunding a dragon to make 
him a vegan sounds quite difficult, and messing with muggles to obtain food 
is out of the question, I'll try reducto, crossbreed and under-feeding to 
breed fashionable and decorative bonsai-dragons for spoiled snobs. If not, 
I'll use legal portkeys unlawfully manipulated, they seem not to trigger any 
alarm, to transport food from more scattered sources and distribute dragons. 
Evanesco should take care of the dirt generated by dragons, but still, the 
smell will be a problem. It should be done in a place where the natural smell 
surpases the dragon's, by far, as a chocolate factory. If I can't count with 
a reliable fire-proof transport method, I'll try draughofthelivingdeading the 
dragons, or considering export doesn't imply alive dragons after all, and 
once in pieces they're likely to be more manageable. As another option I'll 
consider having my reproductive dragons and not raising the youngs, just 
distribute them as soon as they have an aceptable probability of survival, 
but still manageable - you don't need fire proof owls if you can tie the 
dragon and he's not able to break the ropes. 

> Question 5.
> A know-it-all witch has screwed up causality by the unauthorised and
> thoughtless use of a Time-turner. You must draw up a detailed and
> comprehensible description of the way reality has been changed.
> Accurate phrasing is necessary.
> Give the future past present transitive indefinite imperfect
> subjunctives of:
> a) transmogrify
> b) then
> c) cock-up

Huh? Buaaaaa. *Sobs*

Damned know-it-alls.

*leaves question in blank*

> Question 6.
> Compare the distinguishing emotional and physical effects between:
> a) aphrodisiacs
> b) love philtres
> c) Veela infestations
> d) winning a complimentary pass to Madam Whiplash's establishment.

a) "Are you sure this works?"
b) can have side effects as curious and menacing as a Dark Lord, resulting in 
the entire wizarding population - as well as some muggles - being emotionally 
affected, at least
c) "Where's my order of merlin/golden watch/wand/underwear? Hey you!"
d) time to take tea and have a chat with old workmates

> Question 8.
> Many strange objects can be found in the Muggle world. With the aid
> of diagrams describe three (3) common uses for each of the following
> (answer 2 out of 5):
> a) a left-hand ratchet screwdriver
> b) a clockwork mouse
> c) the Eiffel Tower
> d) an abdomicizer
> e) wax fruit

d) an abdomicizer: a support for a table; a shoe organizer; a statue

e) wax fruit: a decorative candle; with some food, an anti plague device (it 
worked with doxys); a children's toy (can be used as a training bludger)

> Question  9.
> Give brief explanations for, and state what actions you would take,
> in each of the following situations:
> a) an acquaintance has a leather footstool, the covering of which
> becomes hairy whenever there's a full moon.
> b) you notice that a large black dog always seems to be following you
> around, you keep seeing someone who resembles you *very* closely and
> your lifeline seems to have vanished from your palm.
> c) while pottering around in the kitchen looking for your spectacles,
> you come across a toad beneath the sink - and under it are some
> broken egg shells.

a) lacking appraisal skills in furniture, I'll just try to make different 
acquaintaces in the future - the idea that it's actual werewolf skin makes me 
uncomfortable.

b) rest in peace

c) be glad that the kitchen is absolutely not clear-crystal-clean every 
surface reflecting, quite the opposite; cover my eyes as possible without 
being blind, don't ever look at mirrors, and sneak out of the house, not 
moving accidentally any piece of furniture, just in case the creature is 
sleeping. Remember breathing.

> Question 10.
> You need to capture
> a) a dragon
> b) a vampire
>
> Describe how you would accomplish this using the following items:
> i) two pork chops
> ii) a bunch of (white flowered) daffodils
> iii) a virgin
> iv) a banjo (tuned to the key of G)
> v) a book of logarithmic tables

1) assume I don't have the slightest idea of how to do it, decide to look for 
alternative answers
2) assume, since I'm not the Chosen One, those creative answers won't gain 
marks

a) how to capture a dragon
i) throw a party - there are different versions, if the virgin is muggle or 
not - it it is, unless you want to throw a DE party, better hide her for 
later - if she's a witch, she can call her friends and advise them to bring 
food - get a banjo player - hide the logaritmic book, you don't want to ruin 
the mood - use the flowers for decoration - fry the chops
ii) if it's a territorial dragon, say, such as an Hebridean Black, he'll come. 
He's outnumbered, just remember not to let your guests get too drunk.

b) how to capture a vampire
i) transfigure the chops into a bottle of blood
ii) rip apart some pages of the book and transfigurate them into old 
pergamins, maps and drawings, decorate the walls
iii) transform daffoils into daisys or lilys and decorate the window, and 
exits, not the door
iv) put the virgin in the room, he'll come and get trappet by the historical 
reminiscences and he'll give you the everlasting vampire speech about old 
times
v) distract him with a couple of glasses of blood and the virgin while he 
keeps with his speech
vi) knock him with the bottle, transform back the daisys into garlic
vii) grab the virgin if she isn't already running, go out of the room, extract 
the key from the banjo and lock the door (of course, this last step is due to 
having read the answers first, but I couldn't resist)

> Totals.
> 148/98 is possible if maximum bonus marks are awarded.
> Watch out for anyone scoring more than 130;  they're not to be trusted.
>
> Otherwise, grade as follows:
>
> 21 +  Outstanding
> 16 - 20  Exceeds Expectations
> 11 - 15  Acceptable
> 6 - 10  Poor
> 0 - 5  Should be fed to Fluffy. Very slowly.

I'm sure that I'm not so bad as to be fed to fluffly...

Silmariel