[HPFGU-OTChatter] Re: "Tom Swifties" (a few more)

[John Walton]

Oh dear...see John's brain leak out through the ears...

"It's not red, it's auburn," Ron said gingerly to his younger sister.

"Now, open your books," said Professor Flitwick shortly.

"What have you done to me?!" Aunt Marge screamed inflatedly.

"You're not my father!" Harry yelled illegitimately to James.

"It's not MY fault I'm clever," Hermione said smartly to Ron.

"These Chocolate Frogs are great," Harry said candidly.

"Advanced Vampirical Protection devices are often Christian in origin,"
Hermione said crossly.

"Oh, no, somebody's killing all the thespians around here!" Lavender said
didactically.

"Whew, this Stilton is a bit smelly," Ron said maturely.

"They don't do decapitations like they used to," Nearly-Headless Nick said
sharply to MacNair.

"Modern witchcraft is a *form* of Paganism," Harry said wiccedly.

"Er, wee, juh par luh frogsay tray bean," Hagrid said fluently.

"Guess I forgot that Time-Turner again," Hermione said belatedly.

NAUGHTINESS WARNING...LOOK AWAY NOW IF YOU'RE SQUEAMISH

"You're such a shit, Draco," Harry said effluently, "but what's that smell?"

"You're such a cunning linguist, Hagrid," Madame Maxime said happily. (okay,
not quite a TS...)

"Hey, does that girl with the flat chest have a lisp or what?" Harry asked
breathlessly.

"Hey, guess, what? I'm an animagus, and I'm a dog when I transform," said
Cho bitchily.

"No, Ron, you can't go out with a first-year," Harry said immaturely.

"Mmmph-mmmmm," Hermione inflatedly (in-fellated-ly...) said from under
Harry's desk.

And one I can't BELIEVE nobody got...

"Wow, I've got a great godfather," said Harry seriously.



Oh dear. I can tell I'm going to be thinking of these aaaaaallllllll night.

--John