Bad Dog Sirius Black (filk)

[coriolan_cmc2001]

No: HPFGUIDX 32267

Bad Dog Sirius Black (from PoA, Chap. 22)

(To the tune of Bad Bad Leroy Brown)

Dedicated to Pippin (the filker, not the LOTR hobbit)

NOTE: For prosodic purposes, Sirius should be sung here as a two-
syllable word (Seer-yus), rather than three (Seer-ee-us)

THE SCENE: King's Cross Station. HARRY, returning home after another 
year at Hogwarts, is greeted none-too-warmly by VERNON

VERNON: (spoken, looking at the envelope in HARRY's hand) What's 
that? If it's another form for me to sign, you've got another ---

HARRY (brightly): It's not. It's a letter from my godfather.

VERNON (sputtering): Godfather? You haven't got a godfather!

HARRY (music)
Well, my parents knew a psycho
Who's a fugitive (in fact!)
And though it may seem odd, they made him my godpa 
He's a guy called Sirius Black

They convicted him of murder
And he earned a life sentence
But he's broken loose now from the ol' wizard hoosegow
And he shows no repentance

And he's bad dog Sirius Black
We first met at the Shrieking Shack
You wouldn't want to mess with him
He's meaner than a junkyard Grim

Now Sirius told my parents
Before their "car accident"
That's he'd look out after his godson, 
And that remains his full intent

He's now making you an offer
That you're too smart to refuse
Says my life I should enjoy, so don't maltreat his boy
`Cause he's a mutt with a short fuse

And he's bad dog Sirius Black
Who thinks that Muggles don't know jack
Oh, he will run roughshod, hon,
If you mess with his godson

It was hard for him to leave me
But before he hit the trail
He said he would rivet his attention toward Privet
Drive, his interest would not fail

So if he sees me get unhappy
When you restrict my magic things
Stuff might get kinda ugly some morning if Dudley 
Wakes up wearing chicken wings

VERNON
And he's bad dog Sirius Black
Keep him off our cul-de-sac!
His bite is worser than his bark
For he practices the arts so dark

BOTH
And he's bad (bad) dog (dog) Sirius Black
Call him the Magical Maniac
He's a killer who's still at large

HARRY
I trust we won't be seein' Marge
.

(Exit, toward Privet Drive)

  - CMC

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm