Seeking counsel, Snape: a SHAM BACHELOR?
Tabouli
tabouli at unite.com.au
Tue Feb 26 14:26:47 UTC 2002
No: HPFGUIDX 35759
About Professor Flitwick, Catlady wrote:
> Yes, but if he were my House master (Flitwick is Master of
> Ravenclaw and I am a Ravenclaw) I don't think I could bear to go to
> him with any problem about sex or broken hearts or other students
> picking on me... This short guy who squeaks in excitement and falls
> off his desk...
Now here's a musing for you all... if you were a student at Hogwarts, who would *you* turn to for counsel on your disastrous love life/family problems/career choices/struggles with school bullies/quarrels with friends/struggles with that nasty Potions master?
As far as we can see, there's no school counsellor. In fact, the person closest to fulfilling this role, for Harry at least, is Dumbledore himself, with extra input from Hermione and Sirius by GoF. Percy tries to dispense some career counselling, which IIRC Harry disregards. Ron has some matey tips about women before the Yule Ball (the blind leading the blind, though he was in fact right in thinking Harry would be sought after).
Hmmm. Perhaps we should look at this issue on a case by case basis.
- To whom does Neville turn with his endless trials and struggles? Hermione for schoolwork, evidently, but other things? Would that fearsome grandmother of his dispense comfort and wisdom in his hour of need? Crouch/Moody appeared to, but of course had darker motivations.
- How about Hermione? Books, obviously, but do people think she *might* just go to McGonagall? She did when she was worried about the Firebolt. It also appears that she may have turned to Ginny about her Krum situation.
- Ron?? I'm sure Percy would have volunteered when he was still at Hogwarts (to Ron's disgust), but I can't see the twins playing counsellor to their little brother. A suffer and brood in silence type, I'd say, who imagines that by not spelling things out no-one will guess what's bothering him (whereas he's actually as transparent as a newly washed window)
- Heh heh, just had a vision of Lavender and Parvati going to Trelawney for oracular womanly wisdom on their love lives... "Draw near, my children, while I focus my Inner Eye on the ways of the heart..."
Ama:
> Pshht! you all say, Snape has a missus! Now look
here, would you really be surprised if JKR sprung
something like this on us?! Tabouli, would you oblige
me with an acronym?<
If she's alive but hidden, legions of Snapefans are going to be devastated that their pin-up is in fact a:
S.H.A.M.B.A.C.H.E.L.O.R. (Snape Has A Missus, But Always Conceals Her Existence - Overly Risky)(Loving wife scenario)
Alternatively, if she's dead, the Snapefans could fantasise about soothing the tears sprung for the feeling he'd been:
S.W.I.N.D.L.E.D. (Snape's Wife Is Now Dead, Loosing Eternal Devastation)(Widower scenario)
Finally, if Snape's wife is a harridan who drove him to Potions, arguably his marriage is having its:
S.W.A.N.S.O.N.G. (Snape's Wife: A Nagging Shrew Or Nasty Gorgon)(Shrew scenario)
Tabouli.
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