What you WON'T read in OoP

[arrowsmithbt]

No: HPFGUIDX 61103

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "Brooke" <brookeshanks at m...> wrote:
> --- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "Tim Regan" <timregan at m...> 
> wrote:
> > Hi All,
> > 
> > This is fun ...
> > 
> > 
> > --- Cassie  wrote:
> > 1. From Hagrid : " Now Harry, I'm supposed to tell you this 
> > secret....."
> > 2. "Fawkes! Stop flicking your ash on the carpet!"
> > 3. At the Dementors : "Now give auntie a nice big kiss!"
> > 4. Snape : "Well done, Neville! 50 points to Gryffindor!"
> > 5. Madame Malkin : "This year the mini is 'in'!".
> > 6. Colin Creevely, pointing his camera : "Keep moving, please!"
> > 7. Ollivander : " For the budget minded we have the PVC model with 
> > simulated grain."
> > 8. " Neville! Can't you control Trevor? There's toadstools all over 
> > the place!"
> > 9. Ron : " That won't work, Harry. According to the Theory of 
> > Indeterminancy...."
> > 10. Dumbledore : " Harry, what I have to tell you 
> > is...Arrrgggghhhh!" Body hits floor. 
> > 11. Ron: "I read in "Hogwarts' a History.........."
> > 12. Hermione: "Well it hardly matters if we miss just one lesson.."
> > 13. Snape: "Thankyou." to any Gryffindor you please
> > 14. Moody: "I was just taking a little relaxation break."
> > 15. Arthur Weasley: "Its just some *ordinary* muggle thing."
> > 16. MacGonagall to Moody: "Really, relaxation well that was just 
> the 
> > thing on my own mind today."
> > 17: Neville: "Harry, why do you always forget your passwords?"
> > 18: Hermione: "Maybe he apparated into Hogwarts?"
> > 19: Petunia: "Do you want to invite your friends to spend the 
> summer 
> > with us, Harry?"
> > 20:Snape to Sirius: "Don't worry about it; I forgive you."
> > 21:Sirius to Snape: "I've always liked your hair."
> > 22:Draco to Harry: "I can't help it. I love you."
> > 23:Lucius Malfoy: "One mustn't take this pure-blood stuff too far."
> > 24:Lily Potter to Harry: "You're adopted."
> > 25. Prof. Trelawney: "It's just a lump of tea leaves"
> > 26. Crabbe and Goyle: "This feast food is just way too fattening"
> > 27. Prof. Snape: "I think I'll lay out in the sun for a bit....I 
> > could use a tan"
> > 28. Uncle Vernon: "Harry, you're an absolute rail.  Petunia, fix 
> > Harry a nice big steak dinner."
> > 29. Uncle Vernon: "Pleasure to see you again Mr. Weasley. You must 
> > come see my new mechanical tie rack."
> > 30. Voldemort (dressed in drag): "Hi everyone.  I'm your new DADA 
> > teacher."
> > 31. Hermione: "Arithmancy is such rubbish.  I should have stayed in 
> > Divination."
> > 32. Any Trio member"I guess they'll have to call us the `Threesome' 
> > now."
> > 33. Dobby: Join me in the boycott against clothes! Wheeeee! *runs 
> > around naked* Down with socks!!! 
> > 34. Dobby/Ginny/Colin: I hate Harry Potter. Down with scar boy! 
> > 35. Hagrid: Eep! I'm not going to get near that thing...it looks 
> > dangerous!  
> > 36. Voldemort: Harry...it is time you knew the truth....Dumbledore 
> > never told  you what happened to your father   Harry: He told me 
> > enough! He told me you  killed him!  Voldemort: No. *I* am your 
> > father!
> > 
> > Now mine ?
> > 
> > 37 Fred and George: "Make way for the heir of Gryffindor, seriously 
> > mundane offspring coming through."
> > 38 Dumbledore: "No Harry, the Dursley's cannot keep you safe this 
> > Summer. But I have found a distant uncle who is happy to look after 
> > you. His name is Count Olaf."
> > 39: Bobby Ewing: "So Harry, Hogwarts, and the whole Wizarding world 
> > was just a dream?"
> > 
> > Cheers,
> > 
> > Dumbledad
> 
>   40. Harry: "Sure Malfoy, you can have my Invisibility Cloak"
>   41. Draco: "I caught the snitch!"
>   42. Ron: "Hermione, I want to be president of S.P.E.W."
>   43. Dobby: "Harry Potter is a bad, BAD wizard!"
>   44. Hagrid: "No, I'm no so much into dragons anymore... I'm looking 
> for a nice little fluffy bunny rabbit"
>   45. Snape: "Harry, can I have your autograph?"
>   46. Dudley: "Hey Harry, you got anymore of those magical toffees?"
>   47. Rita Skeeter: "I've thrown away my Quick Quotes Quill"
>   48. Dumbledore: "You know, I'm thinking it would be much easier to 
> just go ahead and join Voldemort... I'm getting too old for this"
>   49. Fred & George: "Percy told us the BEST joke the other day!"
>   50. Sirius: "You know, I've been missing Azkaban lately..."
> 
> Loving this!!  I need a relaxing potion to get me to Friday night!
> Brooke :o)

Well that took off faster than I thought it would. 
A few more:-

51. Voldemort: "Wormtail? No, I just keep him around to lend a hand occasionally."

52. Lupin: "I've been moonlighting as a guard dog."

53Prof Sprout : " Found thish weed (puff) growing by the (puff) broomshedsh. Weee!"

54. Wormtail: "The cheapskate! It's not even hallmarked!"

55. The Wizarding World - where a green light means stop.