Sirius revisited--emotional maturity

[Jen Reese]

No: HPFGUIDX 104855

> SSSusan:
> Just a quick comment.  I guess my take is that formality isn't the 
> key.  Having never bought the "Love means never having to say 
you're 
> sorry" line from Love Story, I think CLOSE friends need to 
say "I'm 
> sorry" absolutely just as much as those in a more formal 
> relationship.  
> 
> I DO agree that believing Lupin to have been a traitor is a MUCH 
> bigger deal than this offhand full moon remark, and if Sirius did 
> say "I'm sorry" then [anybody got PoA handy?--I'm at work], that 
was 
> an important admission.
> 

Jen: Sirius owns up to a couple of things in the Shrieking Shack. 
First:

"Harry....I as good as killed them...I persuaded Lily and James to 
change to Peter at the last moment...I'm to blame, I know it.." (US, 
POA, chap. 19, p. 365)

Also: 
"Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter," said Lupin. "I assume 
that's why you didn't tell me, Sirius?" he said casually over 
Pettigrew's head.

"Forgive me, Remus" said Black. (p. 373, same chapter)

The assurance with which Lupin questions Sirius, as if he already 
knows the answer, tells me they were very close. That they 'embrace 
like brothers' in this chapter, symbolizes the bond JKR is trying to 
convey about the Marauders when they were in school. That's what 
makes Peter's betrayl even more tragic--he caused four friends, 
close as brothers, to start questioning each other's loyalty. That's 
what led to their downfall.

And in OOTP, another admission of guilt, if not an apology by Sirius:

"Of course he was a bit of an idiot!" said Sirius bracingly. "We 
were all idiots!" and then later, "A lot of people are idiots at the 
age of fifteen. He grew out of it." (OOTP, US, chap. 29, p.670-671)

It just occurred to me that JKR may be using this to draw a parallel 
to Harry in OOTP. NOT that he's hexing people for fun or anything 
like James and Sirius did, but in a way JKR is giving us valuable 
information about how she views a person's behavior at 15--sometimes 
you do or say things you regret, but you can choose to move on. 
James, at least, did move on. I happen to think Sirius moved on as 
well, given the circumstances, in part because he is capable of 
admitting his mistakes.  

Harry needed to hear the message Sirius and Lupin gave him that day. 
Harry deals with so much more than the Marauders did, and he doesn't 
have the luxury of being an 'arrogant little berk' either, given his 
situation. So I like that JKR writes such a normal problem for him 
to deal with --finding out that the generation before you isn't 
perfect, and choosing to improve on their mistakes. OOTP is nothing 
if not a message about all the mistakes adults are capable of!

Jen Reese