Hermione and her parents redux WAS: Re: Wizarding Top Ten

[ceridwennight]

No: HPFGUIDX 188038

Alla:
> But you will be THAT hurt and angry for your daughter trying to save your life?
> No matter how misguided she was in that attempt, you are no match (you meaning
> Mrs. Granger of course) for any of the wizards.

Ceridwen:
Yes, I would be that hurt and angry.  The Grangers may be different.  We don't see much of the Grangers in the series so I can't speak for the character of Mrs Granger at all.  I can only speak for myself and the discussion seems to be going down the road of "any parent" rather than just this one set of parents.  Since I'm a parent, I can vouch that "any parent" wouldn't necessarily sit still for the little chit of a daughter to pull this stuff on me.

Wizards are no more than human.  If I put the kid off her guard I could grab her wand.  Without her wand she's nothing more than a Muggle with potential.  Magic is done with wands.

Alla:
> I mean, I see what Pippin wrote and I pretty much agree with her, except I am
> not so sure that there was a consent, I think it is open question, but I mean,
> surely wanting to save parent's life by any means is a forgivable intention, no?

Ceridwen:
Forgivable intention, sure, but the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Alla:
> Of course Hermione took away their right to decide for themselves, if they did
> not consent and frankly I think it is extremely in character for Hermione, but I
> mean, what if she did not? What if they did consent?

Ceridwen:
Then that would be different.  I can't see any parent agreeing to forget their child unless the child hurt them so much that they never wanted to remember that child again.  There are parents, I've heard, that banish their child and pretend he or she is dead rather than deal with behavior or pain from that child.  I don't understand that mentality either, but it happens.  I would equate the Grangers agreeing to be memory-wiped with their not wanting to remember their daughter and that just does not compute to me with the parents I know or with myself.  In fact, I'd imagine that, if the Grangers agreed to this, they may actually not want their memories restored and that Hermione bringing it up herself was a godsend along the lines of someone wanting a divorce having the spouse saying that he or she wanted one as well.

Alla:
> But even if they did not, if I was Hermione's mother, I surely would be mad
> afterwards, but yeah, I will be grateful too after I calm down.

Ceridwen:
This is where we would part company.  I would never be grateful for someone treating me, an adult, as a child.  The dynamics between me and my daughter would change for the worse forever.  I could never trust that child again.  I would be leery of anything that child told me, I certainly wouldn't want that child to be behind me.

Alla:
> I do not like manipulation and deciding for others in RL and canon, but for
> example, no matter how much I hate Dumbledore's manipulations, if he was
> manipulating for example to SAVE Harry's life instead of slaughtering him, yeah,
> I would be more inclined to forgive him, in my book saving a life just may be
> worth it.

Ceridwen:
Harry was a child when Dumbledore began his manipulations.  Children can't make decisions for themselves.  They don't have the necessary skills or back-knowledge to do so.  Had Dumbledore lived til Harry's 17th birthday and still continued his manipulations, even for the best of intent, he would have been overstepping, IMO.  At that point he owed Harry a full explanation of the situation and his own past actions so Harry could make an informed decision for himself.

Alla:
> However, however, I would absolutely positively forgive Dumbledore for this (snipped)
> manipulation. In my book saving a life just may be worth it.

Ceridwen:
I think Dumbledore, in such a scenario, must give Harry the choice.  He couldn't have done any differently than he did in order for Harry to be able to make an informed decision.  A person's life belongs to that person, not to some Great Wizard with a White Beard, IMO.  For me, I would rather have all the facts, difficult as they are, and decide for myself.

Alla
ETA:
> 
> Oh and before anybody asks this question, NO living with Dursleys does not count in my book as living his life till the war is done lol. This to me just was the beginning of manipulating Harry by making him suffer and make him love WW all the more.

Ceridwen:
Exactly.

Ceridwen.